’ The priest said, ‘Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You’re not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail Mary’s and put $50 in the poor box.’ The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, ‘I saw that ... You didn’t put any money in the poor box!’ The Irishman replied, ‘Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that’s the same as putting it in!’Lemon Squeeze There once was a religious young woman who went to Confession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, ‘Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.’ The priest said, ‘Confess your sins and be forgiven.’ The young woman said, ‘Last night my boyfriend made passionate love to me seven times.’ The priest thought long and hard and then said, ‘Squeeze seven lemons into a glass and then drink the juice.’ The young woman asked, ‘Will this. " she instructed me. I complied and was pleased that most of the dildo stayed in me even when I unclenched. It felt great again and though I couldn't see my wife's face or breasts, I could admire her fine figure and her cascading blonde hair. "Now, close your eyes, clench again and don't stop until I tell you." Not knowing what to expect I complied. I felt her rise up slightly on her knees, the dildo started to slip out of my anus, so I clenched even harder. I felt her push on it so it would stay in. Then I felt her other hand touch my penis a pull it slightly towards my feet. When she sat down I was inside of her warm cunt. This was unbelievable. As she started to move around, backward and forward and then just slightly up and down I tried to figure out what was happening to me. For sure I was being fucked, that much my fevered brain could remember. But how? I dildo that was attached to my wife in such a way that it was basically her dick was in my anus. If I concentrated really hard.
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