Even I couldn’t stand to look into my own eyes. The windows into my soul had long ago been boarded up, putting their very contents into question. And on the train it was the same, many familiar faces, but no familiar people. Like a convoy of blinkered horses, we and the train rattled on. As the journey continued, people began to depart and I began to make myself more comfortable. With the departure of the person sitting opposite me, I slid deeper into my chair, allowing my head to loll to the left. My half open eyes recognised a rift/tear in the fabric of familiarity. Amid the usual clutter of advertising material, I viewed a black rectangle. It was wedged between the seat leg and the train’s side. I made my way to the curious object, unwedging it from its niche. The black was cured leather, and sliding this off revealed a book bound in coarse red paper, and bearing a black inlaid symbol, a circle made up of interconnected swans. The revelation of this familiar object swathed me in. My father died in a freak accident six years ago when I was only twelve. He was driving his car on the road one night when he hit a deer that came crashing right into the car window, killing him instantly. Left were my mother Nina, my older sister Amber and myself. My father had run a traveling business with Aaron and back then. After the accident he bought the rest of the company which left us with plenty of money to be financial secure for the rest of our lives.Every year since my father died we have had this tradition to go out with this monster of a boat. This year the crew consisted of Aaron who was the only one that could operate the boat properly, my mother, my sister and mom's younger sister and my aunt Angelina and last but not least my self.Now being a recently turned eighteen year old I was at my sexual peak and a three week boat ride living with my family wasn't exactly a smooth journey. I usually masturbated at least three to four times a day if not more and since.
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