I certainly was not the same man. The wounds from too many battles left me tired and scarred. I figured whatever fate awaited me had to be better than the hellish loneliness that I left behind.My name is Jessie, Jessie James. I know what you're thinking. It's not my fault. My mother was a big fan of American western history, especially gun slingers, hence the name. I kind of liked it. In Thailand, the name would hold no special meaning. Everything would be new there. I would be a stranger in a very strange land. I had nothing to lose. My son, who rarely spoke to me, was about to finish college. The only women I was able to date back in New York were divorced, over weight, bitter and carrying more baggage than a freight train.At forty nine, I was in pretty good shape with a touch of grey in my hair. I was often told that I didn't look a day over thirty five. I certainly wasn't ready to pack it in. Since there wasn't a lot of sex going on for me after the divorce, the gym became my. They were happy with me because I never bothered them to go out.My friends considered me pretty and when I looked in the mirror, I liked what I saw… But I was a bit shy. In those days I’d rather stay home locked up in my room watching penis pictures and cumshot videos than going out; my mom was very strict regarding dating and going out with boys so I decided not to fight against my parents’ control anymore, and stay locked in my room masturbating. That made me the ideal daughter; it was the perfect cover-up.My parents felt safe because I didn't ask for permission to go to the movies, pajama parties or even go out to eat with my friends. My parents used to say that my neighbor was completely lost because whenever they arrived they saw her with a group of friends at the building’s entrance. Instead, they took pride in their wise daughter, who spent her time studying in the room. They did not know that their daughter was touching herself while enjoying dirty content.I used to laugh to.
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