Every single article fit him perfectly, of course, but he couldn't enjoy the comfort. "I'm trapped," he said aloud to nobody. He stood in the impersonal white room, made the physical manifestation of the black hopelessness that was starting to settle around him. He sat on the bed with the intention of tying his shoes, but as soon as he'd sat he found himself collapsed on his side, knees to his chest, sobbing uncontrollably at what his life had become, and what he had done to himself. He gripped his hair and dug his nails into his skin, feeling the hot tears rushing down his face and he hoped beyond all hope that nobody was watching. It was pitch black by the time Connor opened his eyes again, feeling sore and sick. He sat up slowly and blinked several times to get his head to stop spinning. "Light," he croaked through a dry throat, and a dim glow illuminated the room. Across the room he caught sight of his reflection and had to admit that he looked. "I remember the first trip I made with my Dad. I was just as excited as Bill was now. I had studied the mighty Mississippi in school, seen pictures showing this huge body of water, at some places close to a mile wide. I was so disappointed when we actually crossed over it. The river appeared to be about half a mile wide but in the middle of the city did not seem very impressive. What was more interesting was that we were just outside of Busch Stadium, the home of the Cardinals, and if we looked north we could see the Gateway Arch.When we got there and I told him this was it; he had the same reaction that I had had when I did my first crossing."That's it?" That's it."I brought the rig up to speed and headed onto Interstate 70; next stop Terre Haute, Indiana. We'd be having breakfast in about three hours.The atmosphere in the truck was different somehow. The sexual tension between us was gone. We had satisfied our immediate needs and desires, now, more than ever before, we could relax.
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