Febuary 3That's what I get for listening to Mark...The date was a disaster. I really feel bad too, because it's not like theperson Mark set me up with wasn't nice, but the poor sap had no idea whatto do when I kept acting all...well, like me.The weird thing is, even if I could keep going out with members of mycurrent sex, I'm not sure that it wouldn't work out the same way. I don'tknow which side of the proverbial gender fence I'm on anymore.I don't think I care either.February 12Today was hell.I ran all around town, trying to fill out applications and interview fornew jobs. I never realized how much sexual politics went on in the wholeprocess. Stuff I used to do subconsciously now makes me either comeacross as cold and distant, or gay, depending who I'm talking to.Joe was a bit slow coming around, but he's been great over the lastcouple days. He even offered me a job, just until I can get back on myfeet again. It's not exactly what I was looking for, or what I'm trainedfor for that. Coz time kam hai. Maine pucha kya maja dogi. To vo mujhse thoda door chali gayi or fir usne apna shawl utar kar niche rakh diya.Fir usne apni tishirt nikalni shuru ki. Main uske nange gore pet ko dhekh kar pagal ho gaya. Fir usne apni tishirt puri utar di. Main uske chucho k dekhkar pagal ho gaya. Itne mote, itne gore and ek dum tigh. Saamne ki taraf khade hue. Main uski or jaane laga to usne ishara karke mujhe rukne ko kaha. Main ruk gaya.Fir vo meri taraf kamar karke khadi ho gayi. Uski kamar itni patli thi ki ek hath main aa sakti thi. Fir vo thoda aage ko jhuki. Uski moti gaand uper ko uth gayi main to pagal ho gaya. Uske bad jo usne kiya vo hilane wala tha. Usne apna lower niche khiska diya and fir utar diya. Vo jhuk kar aise hi khadi rahi or apni gaand hila kar matkane lagi Mujhbse raha na gaya. Main uske pas pahunch gaya. Usne black color ki penty dali thi. Gore rang par blavk panty mast lag rahi thi.Maine jate hi use apni bahon main bhar liya. Main uske pure badan ko chumne.
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