My social calendar went from my left hand to having to actually write down and turn down invitations.Was I happy? Does the Pope shit in the woods? Is a Bear Catholic? Yes, that is how happy, but confused I was.The reason for my newfound “stud-lyness” was given to me by JoAnne, a retired schoolteacher who worked at the convenience store where I got my coffee each morning.JoAnne was big rawboned, chain-smoking lady who did not give a damn about anyone’s opinion. JoAnne could crack wise with any of the customers from construction workers to Bank Presidents, and had a loyal following at the store. She mainly worked to keep busy after her longtime partner had passed away.“Eric my boy. You are what is known as a ‘Clock Stopper’.” JoAnne told me.I was puzzled. “I have heard of being so ugly your face would stop a clock. Is that what you mean?”JoAnne exhaled a stream of smoke before continuing. “Nah. I am talking about the young ladies biological clock.” JoAnne looked at her cigarette for a. " I "I dont know, I just wanna know if you forgive me, babe?" You "Yeah, nigga, but why yo shit on rock though?" I "Nigga, I'm sorry O.K." You "Yeah, well let me see it, pull ya drawls down." I pull my drawls down. You "You nasty ass nigga this shit is on rock" I "Cuz of you baby thats why." You "O.K. Well open ya legs up, hhhhah! Shlurp-Glurp-Slurp-Swollurp-Shhlurpy Glihshurp yeah give momma this pipe, shlurp sopple plop glurp, I'ma suck the dog shit out of this dick oooooh, Sluhhhlershy Glerpop- globble shlurp shlop-glop shlllurp-give me that nigga dick hhhhahh.!.!.!" I "W- - wh wh whoa h- h hold up babe damn calm down baby, sss-s suh-suhh suhh slow down." You " Fuck you nigga I love suckin' yo long fat ass juicy dick, swolllurp Awwhll-lurp-Awwhlllll nigga fuck you >>zhlurp
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