" No, I'm good," she said.She was, too. She was fine. She birdied that first hole and sliced and diced the front nine for four under at the turn. Nobody else in her foursome was even playing par golf.Things got a little hairier on the back nine. Her lack of sleep was starting to take a toll. She gave back a stroke on thirteen, and carded a couple of listless pars on the next two holes -- including a long Par Five that, normally, she would have expected to birdie with some ease.Waiting at the sixteenth tee for the group ahead of them to move on, I spoke softly into her ear again. "No practice tonight. No going out to dinner. I'm gonna take you back to the bus, and tuck you in, and serve you dinner in bed. The finest dinner that Lean Cuisine can concoct!"She smiled. "That sounds nice. I'm really whipped," she said."Three more. The leaderboard in this place sucks wind, but I wouldn't be surprised to find out you're ahead of the whole field, right this minute! Three more holes." I know.. She glances down at her side, Red is still sleeping, his features relaxed. Sleep is such a luxury for him that she doesn’t want to wake him for this. Quietly, she extricates herself from the covers and climbs out of bed, careful not to disturb him. She pads silently to the balcony and curls up in one of the patio chairs, wrapping her arms around herself, unable to chase away the chill through the air is balmy. She stares out across the fields, illuminated by starlight, reliving the nightmare in her mind. What would she have done if Ressler and the team hadn’t arrived in time? What if she’d never had the chance to tell him how she felt? She can’t bear the thought of it, cannot think of what her life would look like without Red in it, especially now. It is painful enough to remember all the wasted time, months, years even, that they could have spent together, learning each other, loving each other. It had all been such a waste. And that is what her life will return to, she realizes, if.
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