“But you had better play better than you’ve been playing,” I warned her. “If you don’t it’s going to be expensive ... for us and for you!”Gently she rubbed one of her perfect little buns and squeaked, “You mean... ?”“I mean!”“But they’re still awful sore from the last time,” she complained.“Tough!”It was all the two men could do to control their laughter.“How about handicaps?” I asked in a voice that would carry a bit. This was part of what we had discussed with the pro.Instantly the two were falling all over themselves insisting it was just a friendly match — yeah, sure! — and they weren’t necessary. Kris and I allowed ourselves to be persuaded, finally exchanging winks.[For the benefit of non-golfers who, I suspect, are the large majority of my readers, an explanation of a Nassau is in order. First, it’s done in match play which means that one team or the other wins a hole. If tied, the hole is considered “halved.” The Nassau is actually three matches in one: the front nine, the. “You have no idea if I’m Amy, do you?” the one on the left asked.“Maybe it’s me.” the other giggled.I had no idea what to do. I stood there feeling MOST awkward likely with a very goofy look on my face. They moved over to me, threw their arms around me and kissed either side of my neck. This eased my tension somewhat. Then the one on the right squeezed my nipple. I jumped back from them and pointed at the one on the right.“You’re Amy! Only Amy would have known what that does to me!”“Easy Tiger,” said the one on the right, “Maybe I told Elly about everything we did.”“Or maybe I told her,” giggled the other.After a short pause the one on the left spoke.“Here’s the deal. We’ll give you 10 minutes to figure out who’s who. If you answer correctly when tested you earn a prize. If not, you’ll be punished.”“What if I decline?” I asked.“If you choose not to take the test, there’s no prize OR punishment.”“Guess I have no choice. What can I do to decide who’s who?”“You can do whatever.
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