I just thought we'd break him in slowlytonite and plan an evening next weekend where we bring itall to life. He said you were the one who turned him on to thisfantasy and would be all for it" Carols breath was coming heavier over the phone as I talked.This was heady stuff. I was feeling like Zeus. It occurredto me that this was getting to the actual "we'regonna do this" stage that frightens many newbiesinto the catatonic state you associate with deer caughtin the headlights. I bit my lip and waited, for about 10 seconds."I'm so wet. I haven't felt this horny sinceI was 19. Let's make a plan." The tremor in Carolsvoice had me so hard it hurt. My whole body was flushed andwarm. I had a sudden surplus of seminal fluid that was goingto make laundry day a real bitch. Clutching onto the dominant persona that was to be my rolefor next saturday, before I was washed away on a tide of abusedunderpants, I told Carol to list what toys, clothes andhardware she had that could be pressed into. I don't want to ruin his marriage." I guess I can understand that," I said, still fighting my jealously. "What about Dad, does he know?" No, and I don't intend to tell him either," she said with thinly veiled anger. "He'll find out soon enough anyway."Mom looked at me and started to cry again. I got up and came around and knelt at her feet and hugged her."I don't know what to do. I'm so ashamed," she said and continued to cry. Then she slipped to her knees in front of me, placing her hands over her face, sobbing.My heart was being ripped from my chest. I held her shoulders, unsure what to do no. I was just no good when a woman was crying. I repeated for the tenth time, "We'll get through this." I tried to sound confident. I was the man of the house now. But my head was spinning and I was almost shaking. "I can quit college and get a job ... you know, to make some extra money," I said.My mother looked at me with surprise and gathered herself. "Oh no, that's not necessary. Your father.
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