If you hit it off and I am out of the picture, then so be it. You will still be my best friend, and I will still love you. But I need this. I need for you to give 100% to this. Do you understand me?"I didn't answer for a long while. Zoe probably thought I was weighing her statement, but that wasn't it. I don't even think she had noticed, but Zoe had said she loved me. It was like the air was knocked out of my stomach. I was having trouble hearing and the world started to swim."Cas?"Okay, I was quiet too long and she got worried."Sorry. You're right. It wouldn't be fair to this girl to purposefully make the date go bad or anything. I couldn't do that to someone else. I will give it my best effort, I promise." Great. I knew I could count on you. Now, she has the same lunch as us but sits with some of the smart kids at another table. You need to go ask her out at lunch." Sure thing."I only wished I was as upbeat about this as I tried to sound.I had trouble focusing for most of the rest. For her part, Kira was bowled over by her first girl-on-girl experience and the force of Sadie's personality. So they split off into coupledom and I was back at square one, looking for love in all the wrong places. Then one Sunday afternoon at the beach I ran into Sadie's Aunty Ginny, the pale-skinned, anglicised relative of the black Trini family. I had got along well with Ginny, but had held back from making a move on her because of the beautiful relationship between aunt and niece.She was sunbathing on her own, reading a book, plastered with factor 75 and so apparently happy with her own company that before I sat next to her on the sand I apologised for disturbing her. As it turned out, she was very glad to see me. Shading her eyes like a sailor about to say, “Land ahoy!” she squinted at me through her big sunglasses and smiled. It was a broad, genuine, happy smile and it occurred to me that she must have smiled it many times over the years at various men who made her feel.
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