I went around all the level 12 places I'd decided to sabotage, wrecking the various automatic fire extinguishing systems they had (they had several, some liquid, some gas). In most cases that was best done just by turning some valves off. In other cases I crimped a pipe shut, starving all the downstream sprinkler heads. I opened the control panels of the two backup generators and ripped the guts out of them, turning then into useless lumps of metal. There was a large bank of batteries for emergency lighting, which I disconnected. I'd thought of breaking them open, but the fire should do that. Then I turned all the AC units' temperature and fan settings as high as possible, to help the fires I'd be setting later.A quick sight blob check showed me that this shift's nurse was walking down the hallway toward my anteroom door, but she was still several seconds away yet.I checked the caches of money, that the ID I wanted to steal was where I thought it'd be, and the clothes I wanted to. The third guy smiles and says, “I’m a lollipop salesman.”Stan is seconds away from receiving a vasectomy when his brother and sister-in-law barge in holding their newborn baby.“Stop! You can’t do this!” exclaims the brother.“And why not?” asks Stan.“Don’t you want to have a beautiful baby someday? Like my wife and I have here?”Stan says nothing.The brother grows impatient, “C’mon Stan, I want a nephew. Stan, make me an uncle.”Stan can’t take it anymore. He gives his sister-in-law an apologetic look and asks his brother, “You’re sure you want a nephew?”“Yes,” the brother replies. “It would be an honor.”“Well, congratulations, you’re holding him.”Two buddies were sharing drinks while discussing their wives.“Do you and your wife ever do it doggie style?” asked the one.“Well, not exactly.” His friend replied, “She’s more into the trick dog aspect of it.”“Oh, I see, kinky, huh?”“Well, not exactly. I sit up and beg, and she rolls over and plays dead.”A statue of a naked woman and a naked.
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