Ich lebte in gewisser Weise als Maedchen indem nur von Buben bewohnten Heimgebaeudeteil. Man beschaeftigtesich gern mit mir, blieb aber auf der anderen Seite mirgegenueber auch immer irgendwie auf Distanz. Vermutlich ausAngst vor Klaus.Im Heim war ich 'Lisa'. Die Betreuer und Betreuerinnen hattendamals als ich 8 war sehr schnell meinen Maedchennamenuebernommen. Unsere Heimleiterin, Frau, bzw. Frl.Suittenpointner brauchte dafuer etwas laenger. Doch auch siebegann nach vielleicht einem viertel Jahr, mich mit 'Lisa'anzusprechen. Erst noch etwas zoegernd, doch als ich ganzselbstverstaendlich auf diesen Namen reagierte und michanscheinend auch ihrer Meinung nach maedchenhaft genug benahm,da wurde auch fuer sie der Name 'Lisa' eineSelbstverstaendlichkeit. Sie mochte mich sehr. Ich habe durchihre Sympathie mir gegenueber so manche Privilegien genossen,die meine Mitbewohner nie kennenlernen durften.So mit 12, 13 aber aenderte sich mein Leben erneut. Ploetzlichkam es mir so vor, als wuerde es. She moved her hands across her body, feeling real invisible ropes tied around her, as if she could cut them off and them use them for mountain climbing. Or was it the lines on her skin making her feel like they were real? What was the point of this? To make her feel helpless? To inflict pain? It was certainly working. She had heard that people liked to be tied up like this for sexual pleasure, but she just failed to grasp how anyone could enjoy it. Though with the way the ropes were touching her, she could definitely feel stimulation...She looked down at the card. The words had changed.HAVE A NICE DAY AT SCHOOLThat son of a bitch."Good morning, Helena. Oh ... wow, are you ok?"Helena had arrived at the usual spot where she ate with her friends, and they immediately noticed how flushed her face was. It had taken a lot of courage to leave her room. Her clothes didn't show the invisible ropes on her body, confirming for her that it was really the black lines on her skin that were binding.
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