This went on for years until one day the Corps of Engineers came to build a bridge across that river. John was elated; he told his wife that finally he was going to get the chance to cross over and whip Clarence.He left the house and returned in a matter of minutes. His wife asked what was wrong, didn’t he intend to go over the bridge and whip Clarence?He replied that he never had really seen Clarence up close and didn’t realize his size until he started over the bridge and saw the sign: “CLEARANCE 8 FT 3 IN”From a passenger ship one can see a bearded man on a small island who is shouting and desperately waving is hands.“Who is it?” a passenger asks the captain.“I have no idea. Every year when we pass, he goes mad like that.”BOY: [calls 911] “Hello? I need your help!”911: “All right, what is it?”BOY: “Two girls are fighting over me!”911: “So what’s your emergency?”BOY: “The ugly one is winning”.My friend hates to exercise, which means the treadmill in her bedroom barely gets used.. What should I have tonight for dinner? Should I drive to the store and get some sushi? Or should I just go down the street and grab pizza. Hmmm. The store was 6 miles away and I could pick up pizza about a mile down the road. Tough decision. What should I do? Sushi was definitely more healthy…But I did love the taste of my sausage and pepperoni pizza. Pizza it is! Actually, sad to say…That was hardly something new. About once a week I went through the same dilemma, and wouldn’t you know it, pizza always seemed to win out! Yes, to say the least, I was a regular. They knew me on a first name basis. Not sure that was a good thing. Probably not. But, it sure did taste good! So, I finished getting ready, got in the car, and drove down the street. What THE hell was going on? Who WAS this chick? Wow, what had happened since I was here last? There she was. Not the regulars whom I knew on a first-name basis but rather a young, petite, Venezuelan cutie. About 5’3”. Maybe all of 110 lbs..
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