You have to cut more or sometimes find something else to hurt yourself with to feel the same effects. It’s completely fucked up. I’m lucky in that I didn’t actually get that far. I did stop before it got too serious. I mean, I am aware that hurting yourself in the first place regardless of how or where you do it is a serious issue but I stopped before it got completely unbearable or too difficult to stop it. Supposedly one in four people will at some stage in their lives use self-harm as a coping mechanism. You would think that would make someone feel a little less isolated but it’s funny, I’ve never felt so alone in my life that when I was cutting. It’s a very strange thing in that sense. It’s very common, yet nobody talks about it. I can completely understand why people don’t talk about it, I didn’t until recently. That was just to one person. I had felt I would tell at some point but it just happened and I don’t regret admitting to it one bit. But I think that’s more. . Oh! her legs (sigh) ….. more of them later. Contacting Kate was easy and a time and date was agreed and I found that I was looking forward to the event with great anticipation.That evening, I checked into the hotel and once in the room I texted Kate to say that I had arrived and that I was in room 124 (I even remember the room number) then I had a shower then went to the hotel bar, such that it was, just to settle any nerves about meeting a girl from the internet with just her photos to go on.Back in the room with 15 minutes to, I popped a Viagra and sat down to wait. At exactly 6pm there was a soft tapping at the door, I opened it and was met by the most wonderful smile and she asked, “Are you Gerald?” After answering “Yes” I opened the door wide and she just swept in. I remember that she was wearing a coat and a blue knee length dress and she did a sort of twirl for me and I took her coat i invited her to sit down. After exchanging a few pleasantries, I sat down next her and asked.
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