The size and the straight edges were reminiscent of the shrines to the old gods, but this one had tumbled down decades ago. There was no way to tell which of the gods it had once been dedicated to.She checked her elder senses again and this time found an animal approaching, but not one she was familiar with. She waited behind a tree to see what it was.She’d just barely gotten out of sight when a bear appeared out of the tree line to the east, making no sound as it approached the game trail. It sniffed around, then stared in the direction the deer had run. Unlike the brown and black bears Shavala knew of, this one had gray fur. It was also massive, far larger than any other bear she’d seen. Its back stood taller than her head. The creature reminded her of the huge bear skeleton Corec had fought when they were searching for the wizard Lodarin. Was this where he’d found it?The wind shifted and the bear jerked its head around, staring directly at Shavala. She grimaced. Bears had an even. She processes to be a good-time girl but reading throughout the novel I found her spending most of her time screwing up. I wanted a heroine and I could love and respect and share in her triumphs and yes, a heroine to screw. But frankly this Zina left me limp and even her screwing up appeared faked, I mean unbelievable. I spend most of my time wallowing in her bitching. And then when some action appeared likely the three times she went to a nightclub she fell asleep. Well I ask you. Zina Mace Finds Love is the working title and that title would never had made it to the printing press. On the introduction page you wrote, ‘A Love Story.’ Well she did meet Leo McIntosh and oh dear, what a caricature he was and there was no suggestion he was capable of getting it up tizzy Zina. Neither of them appeared to have heard of penetration. I did well at high school on literary appreciation. I’d give your manuscript three out of five but only because much of the dialogue and scene setting is damn.
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