That evening forever changed my life, as well as Greg's and my relationship. For the next six months, until Greg left for college in August, 1996, Greg and I explored and pleasured each other. We touched, probed, masturbated and even licked and sucked each other in a taboo journey of sexual discovery; but we never actually had intercourse. Greg never initiated any of our encounters. He never came to my room to play. Rather, I would expose myself to him, and come into his room at night. Greg routinely expressed concern about what we were doing. I would touch him or tell him he could touch me, and Greg would say, "Wendy, we shouldn't be doing this." "Do you want me to stop?" I would ask coyly, as his penis would grow erect in my hand. "I don't know... no, I guess not... fuck, I don't know." "You can touch me too," I would add, tempting him.I am certain that I would have allowed Greg to steal my virginity, if he had been so inclined. But he never attempted to mount me. But we. Holding it, I can see that if he squeezes it any harder, it will break. His nostrils are flaring. I go to speak, but in two steps he is on top of me. His right hand drops the bottle and grabs my face, just around my mouth, pushing me back and pinning me up against the door, his left hand holds my right arm back. My free hand grabs his wrist and he stands there, bending his tall, muscular body down, his face just inches from mine, his hot breath on my skin, his blue eyes staring at me for what feels like forever. I try and pull his hand from my face and it begins to register that I have no actual control anymore. My words are useless here, he has more strength in his hand than I have in my entire upper body. I go to speak again and his hand clenches a little harder. He moves closer to me. ‘This attitude of yours needs to disappear,’ he says, ‘and it needs to disappear now.’ His voice is calm and in control, just above a whisper, but very firm, he doesn’t blink as he speaks. ‘If you.
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