I can't explain why. I can only say that during the course of that afternoon I experienced a myriad of conflicting emotions. Kelly switched on her left turn indicator, looked over her shoulder, waited for a gap in the oncoming cars and pulled out onto Jackson Street. Once she was back in the traffic flow she said, "Are you ready to hear more of the story?" "Yes I am." "Okay, my new outfit was a burgundy wool suit with a pencil skirt." I nodded. I now knew what that meant. "It also had this cute waist length jacket. When I wore the Jacket open, it framed by bosom very nicely." I chuckled. "Bosom?" Kelly rolled her eyes. "I was trying to be classy little boy. Would you prefer the term boobies?" I grinned at her. "How about bodacious ta tas." Kelly laughed and pulled up her sweater, exposing her brassiere covered breasts. "Are you suggesting that these magnificent symbols of feminine sexuality should be called ta tas?" Suddenly the driver of the car in the lane to Kelly's left started. “No snow.”“But they’re fun!” she insisted.“No. Put them back.”Rachael pouted and left, only to return with camping pots.“Look! Aren’t they cute? They all fit inside each other like Russian nesting dolls.”“I have those, Rachael. Put them back.”“Are yours so new and shiny?” she asked.“Put them back.”She pouted and left, only to return with a propane lamp. “Hey, Gramps! Check this out! It’s a gas light. Let’s get it!”“I have one. Put it back.”“Fine!” She pouted again. “You’re no fun!”The clerk at the checkout waited. “All done, Sir?”“Yes. And make it quick before she comes back.”“Hey, Gramps! This is amazing! Can you believe this knife has a spoon, and a fork, and a cork screw, and a saw, and a nail file, and a tooth pick, and five blades, and a can opener, and it fits in your pocket! This’ll be really useful.”“No. Put it back, Rachael. All we need is this sleeping bag for you.”Rachael pouted and ignored me when we shopped for food supplies. She refused to talk to me when we finally.
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