It was a moment five years in the making. Finally, we had taken the biggest step in our relationship by moving in together. Excitement was an understatement. ‘Why don’t we start unpacking and then we can reward ourselves tonight,’ said Ben, with his adorable smile. ‘What’s our reward?’ I asked teasingly. ‘I was thinking a bottle of champagne and a nice relaxing bath. Then we’ll see where things go from there.’ ‘I love the sound of that.’ I wrapped my arms around his neck and passionately kissed him. Our lips moved in harmony, like we were made for each other. It was beyond perfection. ‘Why don’t you work on getting your office set up? I’ll work on the bedroom.’ We shared one more kiss before each going our separate ways. As I unpacked my office, I pulled the familiar picture of Ben and me from one of the boxes. It was the two of us at our college graduation, minutes after he had asked me out. Both of us are wearing our black graduation robes, each decorated with various cords and. I could’ve made them fear me.That’s not who I am, though.I don’t feel hate for people.I just feel disgusted by them.You don’t feel the same as me, though.You felt like rage.You felt like fury.You felt like anger.And it was for me.Nobody’s ever felt those things on my behalf.People only feel those because of me.I almost drowned. Yeah, I wasn’t paying attention and I crashed into the wall.Oopsies.I felt awed.You made those girls feel fear.You made them feel regret.You made them feel obedience.And then once they left, they felt anguish. They felt pain. They felt despair.That was when I decided.I love you.But I wasn’t sure what to do with that feeling.You ... You wanted to be with me.But you know what I am.You know I’m a freak.I... How could I believe that, even if I felt it?Peoples’ thoughts don’t always match what they feel. It’s not common, but it happens.I thought maybe that’s what was happening.So I tested you.I teased you. I tortured you.I knew what I was doing.I wanted to see if.
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