I got out of the bath and let the water run out. I toweled myself off and put my silk pajamas on, all the time trying to keep it straight in my head about what I knew was so. Letting myself move into any other area while this was fresh would be destructive to my ability to remain lucid. And that felt like the most important thing in the world at the moment. The next crucial question here was how did I feel about all of this? Did I still love my husband? Had he wiped out years of marriage in just one afternoon? Could I ever come back from this place? I didn’t know much that night, but I did know that I wouldn’t be logical enough to make that decision. The desire to inflict pain on him was the strongest feeling I had at the moment. I wanted him to be hurt as I was. I wanted him to feel what it was like to love and then lose in one swift moment, just as I had to endure that day. I wanted it to hurt him deeply. Something in me clicked over. I took comfort in that thought. It was like a. She wanted me to call up to her house to help her with her new washing machine. She is married but her husband is very selfish and self centred and was gone to the US meeting his family. They had purchased the washing machine a week ago but he was more interested on his trip than fitting the washing machine. I told her “no problem, I’ll get a few bits and call shortly”I hurried to the garage and gathered my tools, she had often asked me to do the odd job when we called so it was no surprise for my wife to be asked if I was at home. My wife also had a disliking to her husband over the way he treats her. Loading the car with what I taught was required for a fairly straight forward job I headed on the 10 minute drive to her house. Pulling into her drive I could see her walk around the side of the house in a nice summer dress, a little see through as the sun light caught it as she walked towards me. “Fair play to you” she said as I got out of the car. “The new one is in the garage” “not.
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