Such was the female poet’s dilemma. While she pushed herself to greater heights, there was always something weighing her down, dragging her below the earth no matter how hard she tried. It seemed to her like an odd paradox—the more intense the search, the farther happiness moved away. It had been this way ever since the incident in front of her home. It took suffering to realize these paradoxes, as though the incident, still fresh in her memory, balanced out what would normally be a graceful, fulfilling life lived with her poetry. She didn’t necessarily regret the incident but constantly wondered why it had to happen to her. It may have been something she wore that night.She drove through early evening traffic and arrived later than usual at the nightclub near Washington Square Park. She couldn’t believe how many women there were wearing next to nothing. She looked like a demure librarian by contrast, and she felt a little out of place from the get-go. The place was packed with hard. I felt like I needed to be there. I needed to be there for Sam. I needed to be there to be a good husband. I needed to be there to stop smoking. And when I left, I felt relaxed and refreshed. I got home a little early and decided to surprise Sam by making dinner. My repertoire was somewhat limited, but I could make a decent salad and definitely could barbeque a mean steak. When Sam arrived home, I greeted her with a hug and a glass of wine, which she accepted graciously. After she had changed and had settled in for a little while, I offered to massage her feet after what I imagined had been a long day. She accepted my offer and sat on the couch while I sat on the floor. ‘Don’t you think you’d be more comfortable without any clothes?’ she asked. It hadn’t occurred to me but, of course, I would feel more comfortable being naked while on the floor tending to Sam’s tired feet. Quickly I stripped out of my clothes and started softly caressing Sam’s feet. I didn’t know why, but I felt.
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