ComThe three of us had been the butt of so many jokes that it wasbecoming unbearable. We were three guys with no way to get back atout tormentors, unable to muster the nerve to strike back, or theeven manliness to try it, and sadly, it had always been this way. Thevery last straw, the one that certainly broke my heart the most waswhen two jocks picked me up, then stuffed me in a trashcan, headfirst. As everyone laughed at me I had to work my way out, then, withjunk and garbage all over my head, they and their friends laughed andwalked away. That was not the worst, but only the latest in anunending parade of pranks and gestures that had been foisted on me,simply because of my size. When my friends found me, I was justfinishing brushing away the trash. During the walk to my car, one ofus, I forget which, suggested something that was so far out that atfirst, we all rejected it as preposterous. We had all suffered fromthe kind of stuff I had just gone through, with myself only thelatest.. My mother, Judith, enforced a strict ban on pornography in our home, and on the rare (but still far too often) occasion when she caught me masturbating, she made it clear that she was displeased. She never tried to impose a ban on masturbation, thankfully. But the tone that she tried to set was clear: Porn? Bad. Masturbation? Bad. Sex? Badder! Most Bad! This went over about as well as you would expect. I masturbated. I found porn. My friends made copies of stuff and slipped it to me on burnt CD-ROMs disguised as music. (Which triggered a lecture on music piracy when those were discovered.) When the internet got big, she limited our access to it and had some weird-ass software installed on the router that blocked access to most pornography. It didn't completely stop me from watching porn when I wanted to, but it was an unnecessary hurdle. (Thanks Mom.) Thankfully, my Aunt Jenny was there to act as a balance (of sorts) to Mom's prudish attitude. She told me that sex wasn't a bad thing.
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