Could I evenget pregnant? I wondered. I couldn't find any reason to believe I couldnot. But the act of making that happen seemed absolutely revolting.Washing my hair took a lot longer than I'd expected. It seemed to takeforever to get enough shampoo into it.Why is it that showering or bathing becomes a time when the mind worksat its deepest level? Perhaps it's the solitude of it all. As I wasgetting cleaned up, the clarity of what was happening began to sink in.My claims to amnesia probably would prove to be a good plan. Not onlywould I not know enough of my new life to not raise questionsotherwise, but I also found that I was still in a state of shock. Myemotions ranged from anger to grief. I was mourning the loss of my oldself, without the ability to process the weight of it all. I was thrustinto this new life, and I had to simply go with it. 'Easier said thandone' would be an understatement! Dammit... I started crying again. Ihave got to get a hold of my emotions.Finally, I was. She tried to convince me that the websites she advised me to check on would go a long way towards giving me some peace of mind. A few Keystrokes? Sure. So how come I had spent the last few weeks doing some stroking of my own as I watched a parade of huge penises on gorgeous males remind me of how disadvantaged I had been for so many years. I’d married Frank 24 years ago, and at the time, I had loved him so much, I never gave too much thought to his small, five inch, endowment. It was, after all, five inches more than I’d had in my 23 years before I’d married. How many times in those lost years had I masturbated silently on the couch as Frank lay asleep in front of the television?“Jess, telephone”. Frank’s call from the next room startled me, making my heart leap as I fought to find the right spot to place the cursor to close down my laptop in case Frank might wander through.“Who is it”? I called back.“Your friend, Sandra”.“I’ll take it in the bedroom, honey”.Sandra’s voice was calm,.
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