"I miss my mom somuch," I sobbed, "and Dad and Kiara..." I wanted a hug from my mom,but I'd settle for one from Lauren, and I knew I wasn't going to getthat, either.After supper, I washed the pots and pans and loaded the dishwasherbefore any of them could start on it. They didn't notice me working,and later I heard Lauren commend Dustin for doing the dishes withoutbeing asked; he looked a little confused for a moment and then said,"Sure, no problem."I sat in the living room with Lauren and Brandon for a while, until theboys had gone to bed and they started getting amorous. Then I startedtoward the front door -- and hesitated.Maybe it was wrong, but I turned back, went down the hall to thebedrooms, and slipped into the dead girl's room. She wasn't using it.And I could use a reminder of Kiara. I curled up with her koalaplushie and lay there quietly, remembering everyone I'd lost -- thosewho'd disappeared and those who'd forgotten I ever existed.I slipped into a fugue state after. “It’s just, there was one point when that guy was initially telling us about the first case, about when you were younger, I saw the look Serenity gave you. The moment he said ‘eight or nine years old,’ and added that the Impaler was probably your age, it was like she suddenly knew he was talking about you.”Fuck.I didn’t respond, having no idea what to say. Or if her assumption was even true.She continued. “Would there be any reason why she would know?” my new fiancé prompted.I sighed heavily. “I…” I took a deep breath. “I was really depressed afterward. For months. Everyone knew something was wrong with me. My parents. Her parents. And of course she knew too.” I paused. “I didn’t tell them anything, but maybe…”“Did they take you to see a therapist or anything?” Gabriella asked gently, sounding more like she was just curious.I shook my head. “No. I mean, why would they? Yeah, I was acting strange, but I didn’t say anything odd. And even if I did see a therapist, then I would have just.
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