They traded. He put on the silky-feeling pink panties, blushing scarlet as he did so. "These gray nylons are next." Clumsily, carefully, he worked his thumbs down into the sheerness of the hose and put them on over his legs, feeling the sensuousness of the fabric, sensing the contact between the taffeta and the nylons and his skin. "Here, put on this old brassiere of mine," she said, handing him a black satin and lace confection. "We can pad it out with a few pairs of panties." Writhing with humiliation and embarrassment and a new and different kind of feeling, he followed her orders in putting on one of her taffeta dresses and high-heeled shoes, shaving carefully and letting her put make-up on him and then perfume. She tied a scarf, gypsy fashion, around his head and then a pair of huge, heavy, gold hoop earrings. Then she let him take off all but one of his petticoats. She tied him to a post in front of the huge mirror, forcing him to see himself thus attired and then she set an. Within that new found hindsight which comes with maturity of adulthood Ihad to dispense with the delusion that my mother had no idea of myinclinations. In my own defence I only knew her in the first six years ofmy life before she was cruelly snatched away from me by a drunk driverwho mowed her down as she stood unaware on the pavement.Yes hindsight can be a wonderful tool in life to boost ones learning andexperience in order to make one wiser. However it is a double edged swordwhich can force the realization of all the supposed deceptions ones selfhad propagated in childhood only to be mortified by the realization inlater life that I was in actual fact fooling no one but myself.I can honestly say I became aware of my true gender at the tender age ofthree when I could not understand why I was being treated as a boy. Someinstinct told me to keep my true feelings to myself. It was the earlysixties after all and not an age of enlightenment.Anyway I realised with that hindsight the mother.
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