I'm not an innocent young thing.But that's what I feel like. I feel like a virgin at the ball. I feel totally susceptible and yet totally accessible. What does that even mean? I'm vulnerable; very, very vulnerable. This could kill me. Can I take this kind of risk with this beautiful young man? I trust him. He's good; deep down he's good. But are we experiencing overpowering lust, or is there more to it? Is the lust based upon real values, true attraction? How can I know?I've got to talk to Donnie. Maybe she can help clarify my emotions. I've got to get Donnie up here. She'll know what to do, how to react. I don't make any major decisions without my sister. I know that seems odd, but we are close; closer than any two sisters I've ever met. We are like two peas in a pod. When she meets Andrew perhaps she will be able to tell where physical attraction ends and emotional attraction begins. I'm afraid.Andrew made love to me. I don't swear very often. Momma and Daddy would die if they. Sterling are fair men." He isn't," I said, thinking that he would know I was referring to the Colonel, who had chosen to watch the junior varsity practice. Mr. Borden didn't respond.Freeman and I ran together. "I have an idea," I said when we were out of hearing range of the other runners. "We can still have our bet but no one will suspect anything." He heard me out and although it was not safe to shake hands, we took each others word that we had a deal. At the end of the day when we cleaned out our lockers to make room for the sophomores who had made the varsity, we found lockers next to each other in the J.V. locker room.Russell and I met later in the bathroom. "Want me to knock one of those pussy seniors out of his gourd?" He asked."Don't get into trouble on my account," I said, without telling him to make a slot for me on the varsity by injuring one of the seniors. "Mr. Borden said that all I have to do is prove my self." How long is that going to take? I can make a spot for you.
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