We all know you look in on the sleeping children. What's that all about? Oh, I know. Heck, maybe that should be brought up to the right people? So, when you are looking in, if you spy a good looking stacked babe in a teddy, just throw her in your bag and bring her to me. I can take it from here, once you drop her off. Heck, this should be easier than making toys all year! Haven't you heard of multi-tasking?Your pal,Bad Irving-----Dear Mr. Irving: Dec 22 On behalf of Santa Claus you are here-by notified of a restraining order. You will cease and desist further harassment of Mr. Claus or any of his enterprises. You are further notified of a pending suit for slandering Mr. Claus by suggesting that his legitimate business inquiries on sleeping children are some form of pedophilia. The last item is a charge of conspiracy by suggesting that he kidnap people. Respectfully,Elf and Elf Esquire-----Listen-up Fat Boy: Dec 23 Hey! Call off your lawyer dogs! This is supposed to be between you. I randomly asked him why he paints his fingernails. "Why? See these hot chicks that surround me? I don't want em. I'm gay, haha." Nate said. I started to develop a semi boner. "That's awesome haha." I responded. "I guess. You're kinda cute, are you bi or gay at all?" He asked. I was shocked it'd be this easy. "I'm bi, why?" I responded. "I want to make out with you right now. I've noticed you stare at me during lunch. Youre cute. I like you. Let's go to the bathroom." he said. I got up and he grabbed my arm and walked me over. "So..what's your name cutie?" he asked me. "Alex." I responded. "Well Alex, Its nice to meet you. Alright were here cmon in." I followed him in. We went to the farthest stall and got in. We locked the door. He was wearing a tight white shirt, and skinny black jeans. I felt like I was in heaven. "Alright Alex. You ready?" he asked. I nodded. He brought his lips to mine and I the same. His lips were incredibly soft, and he was so passionate with it. I was.
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