He was truly appealing. Why hadn’t I noticed before? I probably had. But this time, I was different. All my relationships before Jeff had been based on what they could do for me. They might get something they wanted, but there was no real reciprocation. My concept of a relationship had not included mutuality. Now that it did, I was able to look at a man differently, even though nothing about him had changed. Etienne was charming and I could see that with all his qualities, he could be someone it would be possible and even reasonable to care about. That was it, that was what had been missing. When the entire focus of a relationship is what he can do for me, it isn’t possible to develop feelings for someone who is, essentially, a tool. Adding the concepts of what can I do for him and can I care for him, it’s not clear you can have one without the other. Nonetheless, Etienne was not someone I cared for. He was too far behind to ever catch up to Jeff. If somehow Jeff had not been a part. Therefore, we have seen quite often in the university, and at home. Marinka treated me warmly, friendly, pin up in every way, but also encouraged and helped to learn. In general, a second mother, and essentially and formally. I am attached to her. And in the evenings with jealousy heard her cries for the wall when her father interjected after hard working days in the construction business. Once it happened that Dad went on a business trip for a week and we have planned a joint Marinka cultural pastime: theaters, cinemas, restaurants, even on the Batinah money. She's taught me how to behave in a civilized society, taught me-dressing in general, was in all of my guru, if you will. On one of those fun days we decided to visit one pathetic metropolitan restaurant where pretty drunk. Upon returning home, I decided to take a shower, so to speak, get in shape. Then Marina, as a joke, suggested: "And why do not I give it a rub your back." Well, naturally, I fearfully refused. But Marina is.
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