‘Are you okay?’ My mother had a bewildered look on her face and she continued looking forward. ‘I’m not sure.’ ‘What happened. You look like you just saw a ghost.’ I paused, ‘Did you…see something…’ She turned her head and looked at me. ‘Not exactly. But I felt something.’ ‘What is it?’ I asked. ‘I was in the shower and I felt my hand move on its own. It moved to my private area and I started touching myself. It made me pleasure myself. My mind was gone. My head was somewhere else. The entity reminded me of intimate feelings I used to have, but repressed a long time ago.’ ‘Dad?’ ‘Not exactly,’ she replied. ‘It’s much more intimate than that. I shouldn’t be telling you this.’ ‘You can tell me anything. Just this morning you were saying how we should be honest with each other. This sounds serious and I need to know.’ ‘This is different,’ she said defensively. ‘This is humiliating. You wouldn’t understand.’ I gave her a reassuring look. ‘Don’t forget that we’ll be sl**ping in the same. I mean I know about the letter, like I said, but you need to visit us,” she said.“It’s hard for me. I don’t have a car,” I said, “and the cab is, well, expensive.” She nodded. She knew I was making excuses but didn’t call me on it.“Dad, dad, would pick you up; mom told me so. I mean if you need a ride,” she said.“I don’t know,” I said, trying desperately to avoid getting into an argument with my daughter. “I wouldn’t want to inconvenience him, you know?”“It wouldn’t be an inconvenience,” she said. “I know that for a fact. Mom really wants to be your friend. I mean you guys used to be married and everything. I know that that’s kind of weird, but lots of divorced people remain friends afterwards don’t they?”“I don’t know, maybe,” I said.I had to grant that my daughter was doing her best to be not offending me. She was calling both me and the other guy dad; that was a big deal for me. The other guy didn’t deserve to be called her dad, but in practical terms I guess he was. He was paying.
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