Bettan gave me a hug right away, which was another first for me. In her labby enthusiasm she may have hugged me a little bit harder than my ribs liked, but never mind. Skating and licorice came to mind. Erik was huge. If he had been the one to confront Magda´s attackers they would have ran and I would be here by myself with ribs intact but a broken life. I had a moment of intense self-pity and had to laugh. I was so used to feel sorry for myself that when I was happy I was feeling sorry for how sad I would have been if I wasn´t happy. Sometimes you have to be creative to be miserable. Erik did not hug me, for which I was grateful. They both thanked me over and over for saving Magda. After a while I felt like crying because I was so overwhelmed by knowing someone as wonderful as myself. New feelings, all the time. We had coffee. They talked more than I thought possible, sometimes all three spoke at once. I was distracted a lot of the time, but they loved the flat, that much I. ‘A fine Metaphysical conceit,’ he thought to himself, smiling wryly.His patron, Sir Thomas Egerton, the host of this splendid gathering, nodded to him from the dais with his new, third wife, and Donne made his bow, like an obedient junior diplomat should, not giving away an inkling of his feelings. If that important man, a senior member of the governing Privy Council to the elderly, failing Queen Elizabeth, would guess that his niece, a great lady in her own right, had a tendre for his secretary of dubious background then Donne would be bodily thrown out in an inkling and the doors barred behind him. And more importantly, he would lose his Ann forever.‘When did she become his Ann?’ he thought. Following his return to London from abroad, two years ago, he had concentrated on his diplomatic career, despite the stain of his Roman Catholic family colouring his prospects. However mixed his private feelings might be about his faith, publicly, he had to make his way in the world. So Donne.
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