Now, on any given morning, she is awake before me, already brewing coffee and making breakfast. But not so today. I thoroughly search the apartment when she’s not in the kitchen as usual. As a last resort, I look out the front door and find that her little Chevy is gone. I must have slept like the dead when I finally got to sleep around four a.m. I didn’t even hear her get up and leave! Thinking–hoping, praying–she’s probably already gone to work to avoid a confrontation with me alone, I jump in for a quick shower–forgoing coffee and food. All I need is to see Alyssa–I have to know that we’re okay. The mere thought that we might not be makes my blood freeze with a fear I’ve never experienced before. Ducking under the hot spray to wash away the soap and shampoo, I actually have to advise myself to breathe slowly and deeply. After toweling off quickly and dressing, I lock up the apartment and head for my truck. Later, I won’t be able to tell you anything about the ride to the garage.. They were watching cartoons in the front room with Grandmother.“Erin go get your Polish books and meet me in the den upstairs.”I got my books, paper and pencils from my room. Setting everything up, I could hear Erin running up the stairs. She was excited and we got to work. I still didn’t know how to bring the subject up. After about an hour of reading and writing, Erin was the one that got the conversation started.“Barnim, why was Mom yelling at you this morning?”“Well, she didn’t agree with what I want to do, she wants me to do what she wants.”“Why not?”“There’s a time when you get older, you figure out what you want to do with your life. I figured that out and it’s not the same thing that Mom wants me to do. So, she got mad.”“So, are you going to do what she wants?”“No. So, there’s something else that I need to tell you.”She looked up at me, it was a mixture of curiosity and worry on her face. I figured that ripping off the band aid was the best way to go.“In about a week or so.
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