”“Right. Got it. Set a meeting. Order scripts. Find Traci. You sure don’t waste time before tossing a guy into the deep end.”“It’s only just begun, Richard. I need to get to class now.”“Terry! Help me!” Traci burst into my office, looked frantically around, and flopped back into Richard’s chair. “I don’t know how to act! How can I play Laura? She isn’t funny. She’s such a dweeb.”“Wow!” I started laughing.“What’s so funny? I thought you wanted to talk to me to rescue me from the clutches of that awful director!”“Have you been in his clutches?” I was a little concerned.“No,” she sighed. “He’s really nice. And he’s patiently trying to coach me through this stuff. I just feel so out of my depth. How was your summer?”“Wretched,” I grinned. “I played Petruchio for a director whose ideas for the character are polar opposite of mine and then, while I was performing, I had to teach high school students the rudiments of acting. How was yours?”“I waited tables at IHOP.”“You can’t be a real. Both bridges had to have roadblocks erected to control traffic because several idiots had tried to use the southern, long, one-lane, one-way bridge to get into town, presumably trusting Jesus to keep them safe from head-on collisions. That was foolish of them because Jesus was busy keeping safe all the fully clothed idiots who'd abandoned their cars and were trying to cross the river the wet way, many of whom were as good at swimming in water as they were at walking on it. Considering how against ANY sexual exhibition in public Christians are, they were doing a great job of turning Corvallis into a fucking mess.The unfortunate people who'd bought our Peoria Road property from us were doubtless wishing it was surrounded by the 75th Rangers again, because TV showed that thousands of religiously inspired souvenir hunters had found it and were in the process of ripping the house apart to get keepsakes of 'Saint Mark', or whatever the hell they thought I was. The owners should have put.
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