The words poured from me without thought, almost as if they needed to be freed. ‘Nate should have a wife and children,’ I told him in a calmer tone this time. ‘I can’t be that for him. I could never give that to him. Pretending otherwise just isn’t fair. Can’t you see that? I think he understands that a little but none of the rest of you does. I know what you all think when you see Nate and me together. You and Lilly, Rhiannon and Joe—you’re just all so happy with each other, wouldn’t it be so neat and tidy if Nate and I could be too.’ ‘Have you told the girls this?’ Concern edged Adam’s voice. ‘How can I?’ I asked, tortured. ‘They’re so damn happy! You swept Lilly off her feet — she’s so joyful and bubbly now, like a new woman really. And Rhi’s been given everything she didn’t know she wanted and…do you see how she glows? How can I disappoint them like that?’ ‘They want you to be happy too. Nate could make you happy.’ ‘For how long, Adam?’ I stopped pacing and looked down at him.. You know my reputation as a dead shot with my shotgun; I ain't gonna miss. You doubt it, jus' try me!" OK! OK, Marshal. Point that thin' somewheres else. We surrender! Don't do nothing rash!"At that statement, Edward P. Smith jerked a cudgel away from one of the henchmen and bopped all three of his captors smartly on the head! All three fell to the ground, unconscious.Eddy frowned and said, "Mr. Smith, I wish you hadn't gone an' done that. Now we gotta carry 'em to jail, 'stead of them walking on their own." I'm sorry, Marshal Johnson, I must have lost my head! They jus' poked me with them damn cudgels too fuckin' much this evenin'." That's OK, Mr. Smith. We'll manage. Kin you git home by yourself, or do you need help?" No, I think that I've walked 'bout all I kin manage this night. Please use this dime to send somebody for my stable boy to bring my carriage around. I'll jus' sit here 'til he shows up." I'll do that, Mr. Smith. We'll now bid you a good night." Eddy signaled his men.
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