"At least not until now.I am having some dreams of being female. It is not want I want, it'sjust a dream, that I am not me. Is this normal? To be frank Doc, Iwonder if I am losing touch."I spent another hour on his couch and we talked through some of theissues. No more "regression" thankfully. That seemed to me to be thestart of all this. But what we were able to establish was that I hadfound a way to function, and actually function extremely well, withoutdrugs. He convinced me that my real fear was that I had learned that Ihad a female psyche, and that this was a crisis for my masculinity. Ihad to get over that and find a way to function.As I pulled out my card to pay for both sessions he told me: "Repressingfeelings can be dangerous. Let things happen. I think you are on theright path.I went home that evening and ran myself a fragrant bath. I shaved myentire body. I washed my hair and wrapped it up in a high towel. Imoisturized. I put on my peignoir. I watched. It was the same music that they had played at the Carousel several nights earlier, the time I missed their professional debut because I was led away for the lap dance. I sat forward as the girls began moving to the music It was riveting as they removed their blouse leaving the pure white bras against their nearly bronze skin. Now as they moved, they quickly unhooked the bras, but didn’t throw them away, instead, as they danced, they would give me only short peeks of the skin beneath the bra, skin that seemed to glow bright white against their magnificent tans. Their long hair added to the performance, somehow falling over an exposed breast after I got only the slightest glimpse of white skin and the briefest hint of a bright pink areola and nipple. They’d then toss back the hair, but suddenly the loose bra covered them again. I reached to my crotch and adjusted my now hard cock just as they both tossed the bras aside, and turned to face me, the hair cascading back behind their.
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