"I think," she said slowly after my last sigh signaled the end of the story, "we should have that drink now. You stay put. What do you want?"I thought of the last time I had a drink with a woman on this sofa, and what it had started. "Vodka and tonic?" I said, almost like I was asking her permission in my own house.Jan got up and fiddled around behind the bar and came back with two strong ones. We both took a long sip, and Jan asked, "What does she look like?"I realized that I hadn't really described her yet, only that she was young, tall, and attractive. I thought for a moment. "Imagine Susan Anton, with muscles."Jan frowned for a moment, looked at the ceiling, then back at me. "Wow." Yeah," I said sheepishly. "Jan... I don't want you to think that I've changed into some... lesbian, or..." Nina," she stopped me, "You've been lonely, you've been unfulfilled. You met somebody exciting... and tender... and caring, and you-" here she had a little trouble getting it out--"you love her."I. The nextmorning, Allison's mom helped me pick out a good outfit, and off Iwent. Nicky and Lisa met me and the door, complimented me on theoutfit, and soon it was time for classes.I felt like everyone was staring at me. Fortunately, I had Nicky andLisa with me the whole day, which was the only way it was bearable atall. I really had trouble with the bathroom idea, and wished I could gointo a staff bathroom instead.Worse, I felt terrible anxiety about being in any place with only oneexit. I also really became nervous anytime a boy came too close to me,even when they were clearly just trying to welcome me back and give metheir support.But somehow, I got through the day with only one major incident.Silvia, who was the girl who was responsible for the negativity beingspread about Allison on the web, decided to try and confront us, andsaid I was a faker, and that I had set up "poor Bill," who was beingrailroaded.I was very upset, but Nicky and Lisa got me away from her. When I gothome, I.
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