I was glad it didn’t. There was a couple three rows ahead of us, but at the moment the bus was only about half full. We had some privacy. I’d bought some chips and candy bars at a small grocery store and we ate and giggled and talked.It was a wonderful day, as I remember it. I was in love with a girl that thought she was in love with me, too. I felt an anticipation, for the night. For the cover of darkness. I knew we’d kiss some more, at least.Sure enough, when darkness fell, Willow crawled right on into my lap. She faced down, laying on my body, straddling my legs with hers. Her face was right in mine, and I could smell her potato chip-flavored breath. I got a Coke from the bag and we both had a drink. It was dark in the back of the bus, blessedly dark.She started it. I was going to let it happen that way, I was going to let her set the pace. She drifted closer and closer, and finally our lips touched. She was a good kisser. Within just two or three kisses, I felt her little tongue. As a c***d I alwaysfelt more comfortable with girls than other boys. As an adolescent, Iparticipated in sports and was pretty good but I always wanted to be acheerleader. I used to go into my parents' room when I was alone in thehouse and put on my mom's clothes. I was so ashamed of what I did andwhile I did get aroused by wearing women's clothing it also felt"comfortable". Sometimes I would even try some of her makeup but alwayswashed it off and put everything back where it belonged.I thought I was a transvestite but there was always the feeling thatsomehow I was not really a boy. When I was very little, I would pray toGod at night to please change me to a girl. When I watched movies or thetelevision, I would imagine myself to be the lead female role. The firsttime I saw the Star Wars movies as a k**, I wanted to be Princess Leiaespecially when she wore that costume in Return of the Jedi. When I was inmiddle school and the girls bodies started changing I was so jealous ofthem.Mostly.
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