His bedtime reading matter included the first edition of The Herald, a new community newspaper. After reading all the news items and articles and becoming thoroughly sick of cheesy pictures of local flower shows, his eyes wandered down the classified ads. Local decorators, gardeners, and odd job men vied to offer their services. Right at the bottom of the column one notice caught his eye: SENSUAL HOLISTIC MASSAGE. It turned out that this ‘by appointment only’ service was being offered by a local lady named 'Voluptuous Vera', who had provided her mobile phone number. Terry decided to call her in the morning when the coast was clear, once his wife had set off to spend the day shopping in town with a friend. The opening of the conversation with Vera was somewhat tense. Terry was anxious to know what it was going to cost, what exactly would be involved, and above all whether total discretion could be guaranteed.“My normal service is £50, payable in cash in advance, though there are. Before I got a word out, Kylie started in again. "There you were; this hot writer of erotic stories. When I read them I got all steamed up. So, I married you, believing it was going to be hot sex all the time." Understanding began to dawn on me. "But, honey," I tried to explain, "the medications. You know they slowed me down." "Bullshit!" she spat. "All those times, the months, no, the years, I've been getting myself off with various toys because you just didn't have the urge." "It was the meds, baby, I swear." I'd developed some blood pressure and cholesterol problems and had to take meds that really blunted my sex drive. "Really," Kylie said. "So, what happened last night?" There was a flash in my brain as the light suddenly came on. It was Saturday morning in our household. We'd both slept in rather later than usual due to the strenuous activity of the previous evening. Kylie awakened early and made the coffee. It was when I joined her that the events of the night before became an.
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