Was I risking an eternity of hell? Had I danced with the devil in my mother's naked, and childlike state? What was the one thing I risked that meant so much to me? To a child, the answer is obvious, life. To me it was my mother. I knew my life wasn't in danger, and other than my mischievous sexual shennanigans, I was a good boy. Compareed to the terrible life my father had given to his devoted wife, I seemed damn near angelic.So the next, question had to be, why did my mother think she deserved to be punished? She was the most god fearing person on the planet, and her other personality was as innocent as any child. I was the only evil in my mother's life. Yeah, evil like a nun with a run in her stockings. After consulting my vast internal bookshelf of bible stories, I determined a crock of stinking shit had been shat therein. Essentially, I was just a horny kid doing whatever it took to get a taste of tit. There was something very wrong with my mother's behavior, and I decided then. We really were great mates. We drove down to Blockbuster and poured through the movies, finally settling on American Beauty. Neither of us had seen it and we'd heard it was good. Arriving home, we showered, got into our pyjamas and settled onto the lounge to watch the movie. Not long after the opening credits, there's a scene where Kevin Spacey is in the shower masturbating. I cringed a bit at the scene hoping it would slip by unnoticed. As I suspected it didn't go unnoticed and as the scene finished Bec turned to me and asked "Do all guys do that?" "Do what?" I asked knowing exactly what she meant. "You know, jerk off?" "Hey Bec, how would I know what other men do?" "Do you do it?" "Hey, what is this, the inquisition or something?" After a short pause Bec asked again, "How often do you do it?" I was embarrassed and a tad annoyed by her questions so I threw it back to her, "Seeing as you're getting so personal, do you masturbate?" She looked me in the eye and said, "Almost.
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