And if I did let April kiss me, maybe there was a chance she’d do something about that boner! Thinking that made it even more painful.“I want to,” I said. “I really do, but...”“Jesse, it’s between me and my husband. He’ll never know I was with you, if that’s what you’re worried about.”I was worried about Donny, although I was almost as tall as he was, and I thought I was probably stronger. But what my dad thought really mattered. And so did what Francesca thought. I didn’t want to upset her, but I also was worried about Saturday. I knew all about sex, but except for kissing Francesca and touching her bare boob under her shirt, I hadn’t done anything. And I thought April might be willing to do some of those things so I could learn and make it better for Francesca.“Nobody can find out,” I said, or rather, the rock-hard boner in my pants made me say.“Nobody will. Now, how about that kiss?”I took a step towards her, and she took one towards me. We put our arms around each other and moved. I certainly had been bad. And I do know that now I too have to look forward to attacks, harassment and ridicule from former friends and classmates. Now I can also understand what Marjorie must have gone through. I can relate so much more to her now. And I'm glad that I hadn't been there when she was assaulted.'"Mom, I'm so afraid. I mean, look at me. Everybody will stare at me. Do I have to go to school?"Mom shushed me, "It will not be that bad. Besides you'll have your brother there with you."I snorted, "A lot of good that will do me. He's never backed me up before." Maybe he'll surprise you this time, sweetheart. Just go with the flow." She paused for a moment. "How are you feeling now?" A little better, I'm sorry for trying to kill myself. I didn't mean to hurt you and Dad. I just felt so awful."Mom hugged me again, "That's okay honey, we understand that you're going through some tough times. And I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I need to take you to the MORFS center in.
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