Sammy is the only woman Ive had sex with and that was tonight. I replied Yes I know, dont worry about it. He said Its weird, I love Sammy, Ive loved her ever since I was four years old, She is the only woman I could ever… Well I dont know if I can explain it, have you ever loved someone so badly that it hurts but you know its wrong and you can do nothing about it? I replied Not really. Dont get me wrong, I love Dave but thats how I feel about Sammy, it hurts me that Im gay when I love her so much and she loves me. I think Im talking total balls. Upstairs I knew this was the last time Id ever see… He broke down and began weeping again. I guided him to sit at a kitchen chair, put a coffee in front of him and pulled up another char. I have to admit that I was uncomfortable with a man that I barely knew pouring out so much emotion. He was upsetting me. Ive known Sammy was dying since before I met her so Ive never known her at her best. This man had known her most of his life, he loved. If they were to have this conversation, it should be at a bar on a day's leave, not in such dire surroundings. But there was something in Jor's voice – a kind of beseeching – that Aiden couldn't ignore."I had two huge bowls of ice cream," Aiden said. "It cost me all of my savings, and I reported for duty the next morning with an awful stomachache. But it was worth it."Jor chuckled. "I forget how young you are, sometimes." Not as young as I was then." So this was how it was going to be – Jor laughing at his inexperience yet again. "What about you? If you're so sure that everyone has a big blow-out before they go, what was yours?"Jor got quiet all of a sudden. "I shouldn't talk about it."Aiden gestured to the darkness around him, before realizing that Jor wouldn't be able to see his hand motions. "Jor, it's all right. I won't tell anyone, and there's no one else here but the shadows." Aiden rubbed his shoulder to assure him that whatever was said between them would not leave this cave.
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