Jimmy was approaching 30 and had worked since leaving high school, butsince he got made redundant at Home Depot three months ago he justsomehow couldn't seem to get back into the ranks of employment, this wasthe fifth fuckin interview now and Jimmy was starting to get desperate.His savings would only stretch so far and the rent was due on theapartment plus the fact his girlfriend had just dumped him, "fuckingbitch," he tried to explain that everything would soon be back on trackbut no, all Janine would say was, "sorry Jimmy, but I'm not down withthis unemployment thing, it's just so not cool and all my girlfriends inthe salon are starting to talk, like, you can do so much better and howyou gonna afford D&G when you're dating "A LOSER."At that point Jimmy cursed silently, fuckin whore's that's all they weregood for, the lot of em, if only women realized they were actually allsat on a fortune, that last bit brought a smile to Jimmy's face andsuddenly he had an idea, he wanted to get. "This isn't the end of the world," Dad told me. I grimaced at him. Itcertainly felt like the end to me. Everybody in the world now knew that Ihad just had my first period! The whole world! This wasn't like being inclass at school the first time and not knowing what to do. This was on aglobal scale! I knew I had fans all over the world, and the pressconference, or at least the news, had spread to them by now.Dad held up a stack of papers, which left me puzzled."Scott just faxed these over," he said. "They might cheer you up a bit." What are they?" I asked. I was ready for any glimmer of hope that thesefeelings would end."These are the results of some polls that were conducted since the pressconference," Dad replied. "Your popularity is skyrocketing right now." Oh great. Now I'm famous because of my misery," I cried, and I couldfeel the tears start to bubble in my eyes once more."While some of it may be because of your misfortune, the majority of itis not," Dad said. I grunted, because.
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