"No, I like being a boy," I protested,but I must admit I loved what I saw in the hall mirror as we walked outthe door.Soon we stopped to pick up Aunt Joan and Mary, who both kissed andhugged me and told me how pretty I was and happy they were that I wascoming out with them. Aunt Joan said, "Girl just love to shop and I amsure you will like it too." Mary took my hand and sat in the back seatwith me. She was now 15, and she kept talking very low about all theboys she liked, the latest clothing trends, new makeup items, etc. Shedid not talk to me about sexy things, but she made it clear she was gagaover one boy in particular. She loved watching him when he was swimmingand she could see his bare chest and muscular arms. "He also has verybeautiful eyes." She looked into my eyes, and said, "Yours are beautifultoo...for a girl." She then hugged me again and said she was so gladthat I agreed to go shopping.For me the best part of shopping was the shoe store. A HS senior about17 was helping. I thanked both Ashley and Brenda before they left the house.As soon as the door closed, Kristen put her arms around me, squeezed me tight and said, “Go get your boots, you need to go for a hike and I’d like to join you if you’ll let me.”We held hands the entire time we walked around that nature preserve. When we were alone, we spoke about the things that could happen and what we wanted to do. It was mostly Kristen grilling me, but she helped shape my thoughts and fears. I was terrified of giving up the slaves and have it all becoming public. I liked to think of myself as a good person, but I had clearly done very bad things or allowed them to be done in my name. I had come very close to having the same thing done to me, but was that really an excuse?After our hike, we went home and cleaned up before heading over to Brenda’s. None of them would care what we were wearing or how we looked, but I felt it was important for us to be clean and look our best.I knocked on Brenda’s door,.
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