Even now, the walls surrounding me change, visions like dozens of paintings moving, flowing into each other, each a though passing in font of my eyes. As time has gone by, I’ve start to lose the ability to control these… manifestations. I must focus in something simple, inanimate, in order to keep my thoughts from turning my existence into a living nightmare, ever more than it already is. This, my letter to you, is what keeps order for the moment, seeing each letter form each word, keeps each instant it’s own. I remember when I was 10, just beginning my first year in little league, still innocent and small. My life until that point had been just as any other, almost. I knew I was different, special perhaps, being able to play with anyone, or with anything at anytime, just by focusing. I kept this secret to myself, not wanting to share with anyone else. I still had some friend, from my neighborhood, but when I played with them, it was strictly in the real world. One day, just as. As she stared at him, he didn’t move. She could hear his breath coming harsh through his lips and his hands were tense where they rested against her hips. His eyes were shadowed but she could see enough of him to see the muscles in his throat work as he swallowed. Biting her lip, Mina lifted her chin and stretched herself from top to bottom. Her move shifted them on the couch so that Drew’s thigh slipped between hers. Drew became even more still, if that were possible, and Mina couldn’t help but smile. Some distant part of her mind reminded her that they’d only met a couple weeks ago. That she hadn’t been with any man except Lawrence. That she should feel nervous and had always felt nervous with men, because of her self-image, her lack of experience and her overall shyness. Instead, her desire for Drew made her feel brave and attractive. Maybe it’s the look on his face right now, she thought. A look that was dark and filled with intent. He would make love to her right now if she let.
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