Upstairs was the master bedroom, bath, and two spare bedrooms. There was a doorway leading to the attic that Helen had never investigated but they peeked enough to determine there was room for even more storage.Out in the barn they did the same thing, checking out spaces, storage and the general condition of everything. There was a large room separated from the main barn area. They weren’t sure what it had been used for, since it was mostly just storage now. It seemed to be enclosed, though, with good plumbing, electrical, and flooring. Perhaps, at one time, it had been living quarters for a hired hand.As they were walking through the main barn, between the stalls toward the doorway to the stable in back, Dr. Anna’s curiosity got the better of her. “Why are we here, Helen? You are showing me things, inspecting, asking questions. What’s going on?”“We’ve talked about how you wish you could be located out here among your clients. What about this place, could it work?”“I couldn’t afford. In fact, I had been taken for a girl quite often during my last year as a boy in school, by people who didn't know me.I never took part in physical activities after I started to transition. I was exempted from it by both schools. The cover for it was that I had a heart condition.My clothes by this time came only from the girl's section of stores. I had no female jewellery before the public gender role switch and never had much jewellery before I met my current boyfriend. I got my first female necklace from my parents as a gift when I ended my school life as a boy. I first had my ears pierced when I turned 19 and by that time I'd finally decided I would do my best to accept my new gender role and try to live with it.I started to feel even more frustrated inside about living as a girl full time and I was sure that I was doing a big mistake with the transition. I just couldn't stop it. I was feeling like I'd robbed myself of the chance to find out what a male life really would have been.
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