Who are you trying to kid?’ ‘I didn’t lie to you about the vasectomy. Why would I lie to you about this?’ ‘If it’s not him I’m cutting the whole package off, without benefit of anesthesia.’ Rosalynn asked, ‘What are you doing up at this hour of the morning, Even?’ ‘Rosalynn, do you want the short answer, or the long answer?’ ‘I’ve taken the whole day off. That lying bastard is taking care of the children, until I decide to leave this room. Start with the short answer, and I’ll decide if I want to hear the long one.’ ‘Delicious.’ ‘That is the short answer?’ ‘Roz, I can’t make it any shorter than that.’ ‘Let me talk to her Even. It will be funnier coming from her.’ ‘Good morning Rosalynn, I am an innocent maiden, looking for birth control pills. I did nothing wrong.’ Rosalynn laughed. ‘Delicious, according to my husband you should be sprouting horns. Should we start from the airplane ride yesterday, and go forward or this morning’s conversation and work backwards.’ ‘Rosalynn, I asked. I shrugged and stood up. There was something in the bedroom that I wanted to get anyway. Now was just the perfect time. As your father grabbed his coat, I could hear him as he thanked you again for the great gifts, and wonderful dinner. I smiled, as I closed the door behind me, and hoped that he’d keep you occupied for at least a few minutes. I walked over to the closet and pushed the door open. I had hid a red bag behind one of the boxes on the top shelf of our closet, and I reached in to pull it down. I smiled as I shut the door back and walked into the bathroom, and I knew that what I had in the bag was going to really surprise you. Just as I closed the door, I heard you walk into the bedroom. “Baby, I’m gonna run downstairs with Dad real fast, I’ll be right back. Be waiting for me.” You yelled from the door. I smiled, perfect. I dumped the bag out onto the sink and began to take off my clothes. My bra was already unfastened, and my jeans were already undone, you had done the.
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