But my agency has nothing to do with farmers. The only manure we see is the stuff our boss spreads through his memos. And the people we actually are dealing with don't appreciate it when they can't get us after 11 a.m. Pacific time.None of this makes any difference to the idiot, which is why I spend the wee hours of every weekday morning trying to come up with nice things to say about this schedule.I've been on this shift for two years last Wednesday, and in all that time I'd come up with exactly one nice thing: The subway isn't very crowded.That means a guaranteed seat for everyone, which is quite a luxury, at least in the tourist season. D.C. has subway stations that could hide the Goodyear blimp, but there are never enough seats to go around when the juvenile delinquents and peripatetic geriatrics of every state in the nation descend on the capital to buy cheesy souvenirs and stare up Lincoln's nose. It's a mess, but one those of us on the earlybird shift are spared.We're a cozy. When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.Nothing worked.People stopped coming over to visit.Repairmen refused to work in the house.The maid quit.Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move. A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls.Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told.
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