Having never been through one of these events, I was attracted to the strong bonding that grew stronger as the issue date approached. All this frenetic energy all around me happened to coalesce with what was happening to me at home. Joey’s obsessive interest in exhibiting me, his growing attention to my clothes, and new found insistence on my public sexuality, had come to produce profound (and welcomed) changes in me and how I felt about myself. I was so much more confident about my overall appearance, but especially about my body. It was such a strange transition. I had become a chrysalis, exchanging my old drab, figure-obscuring wardrobe for the clothes Joey approved of now. And I felt a corresponding change deep inside of me. A new and much more confident woman was emerging, one who could admit to the growing sexual nature inside her that Joey had, intentionally or not, released. And sadly, a sexual tension Joey was less and less able to satisfy wholly. So maybe a more. His eyes inspected me more closely, tilting my face side to side, rubbing his thumb along my bottom lip, and pinning me to the floor with one hand on my shoulder and collar bone the other on my thigh. My eyes must have looked terrified because he smiled and said, “It’ll be okay Harper. I’ll be gentle.”It was then that my mind caught up with me and I tried to pry myself up from the floor. He ignored me and slid his hand from my thigh to between my legs, drawing my underwear down to reveal my smooth and naked flesh. I felt so bare, waxed, and oiled, and displayed for him. Tears sprung to my eyes and I found my voice again, though it was shaking.“No. Ethan, no. I don’t want this.”There. it was done. that’s what you were supposed to say and then they had no deniability, it was rape if he continued. Not a misunderstanding. “Nobody is ready for their first-time honey. But you’re one of the lucky ones because I’m going be real soft with you.”Then his fingers were inside me. Prodding me,.
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