I wiped my eyes and pulled my mirror out of my small purse, fixing my make-up. I hated how I looked, too much make-up and not enough clothes. Jeremy had been my dealer for a while, then my boyfriend, then my abuser, and finally…my pimp. He bought me slutty mini-skirts and revealing tube-tops, a switch blade, and pepper spray. I still hadnt gotten a john, a trick, but something told me tonights the night. I was right, when an hour passed and a car pulled up. How much? said a voice, clear but shakey. I couldnt see in, but I answered as I was taught: 15 for hand, 25 for oral, 60 for puss, 60 for ass, and 130 per hour for everything. Get in, please, the voice urged, and I climbed in the passenger seat, finally looking at my trick. He looked to be in his late teens, early twenties. He had precisely cut hair, glasses, a plaid collared shirt, and khakis. It looked to be his first time, too. He drove to a motel a block away, and pulled me into one of the rooms. Um, I-I-Id like to start. If you fought and won, theywould simply throw someone else at you until you lost. It was about thistime that I discovered my own ability to find stress relief. Yes, youknow what that was. I did it a lot. How I discovered it was anotherstory.One day I was digging through some boxes. My parents were away, and Icame across a box of nightgowns. Why my parents had them, I will neverknow. But when I touched them I instantly became enthralled by theirfeel. Silky and smooth, they felt so good against the skin. So much so Istripped down and slipped on one. I was so excited, first because I knewI should not be doing that, but second by the pure exhilaration of how itfelt. I fantasized at that moment what it must be like to be female, tobe able to wear such beautiful things. My excitement built to a pointwhere I had my first orgasm. I can tell you I was scared out of my mind.I had soiled this sexy garment, my parents would find out, they wouldthink I'm deranged, and ship me off somewhere. I.
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