Where does an Irish family go on vacation? A different bar.Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a blonde baby? They named him “Sum Ting Wong”What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other? A speech impedimentWhat’s the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo? A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with... “a recipe”.How do you get a sweet 80-year-old lady to say the F word? Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell BINGO!This is compliments of Mario MDo Not Attempt drinking anything hot while enjoying this!!!!After having been told my danglies looked like an elderly Rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this VEET as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly successful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits. Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus’s birthday as a bit of a treat. I ordered it well in advance. I asked her if she was finding everything and she said yes, as she began slicing, dicing, and preparing.I walked up behind her. I reached my arms through hers and gently cupped her breasts while kissing her neck."Unless you want me to slip and cut you, you better go find something else to do," she warned. I released her and started walking away when she grabbed my arm and swung me around. She then put her arms around my neck and kissed me passionately. When we pulled away, she said, "I love the attention you show me. I just wanted you to know that." I too, love the attention I get from you," I returned. "I'm assuming you gave Lena directions." Yes, I did, and she should be here shortly. She was going to pick up Christina and come on over. By the way, I brought hamburger meat for them in case they don't want steak," she said.I walked back to the French doors and propped them open. It was gonna be a very nice evening weather wise. My backyard was about fifty feet off the thirteenth.
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