"Can I come in?" she asked in a little girl voice, she sounded about ten.I opened the door wide. "You're always welcome here, you know that." Were you going out?" she asked as she came in, she stopped in the middle of the living room looking uncomfortable."I was going to run." It's snowing." Yeah, but it's not that cold. I hate running, but it keeps me in shape." I didn't add that I could stop thinking when I ran, and that right now I didn't want to think."I wanted to say I'm sorry." Now she sounded about six."You don't have anything to be sorry about. I was out of line. I tried to force you to do something that you didn't want to do." I..." She rushed forward and hugged me. Hard. "I shouldn't have yelled. And I shouldn't have said fuc... those words you don't like." You're a big girl. I shouldn't have tried to make you tell me something you didn't want to."Kelly buried her face in my chest. "I don't want to be a big girl," she said, her voice muffled. Then she sobbed.I wrapped my. I like women’s bodies and football and dirty jokes and pints of beer and rugby and if I watch gay pornography I am turned off. I think that makes me straight?I am a field engineer and travel a lot with full expenses, so often I will take my partner with me and she will shop while I work, and then we enjoy the hospitality of a decent hotel. I was on yet another jaunt to bonnie Scotland but she had to work. On this occasion I would have to travel alone but it was only for two nights. Not so bad really, but boring, and this hotel was very pleasant. A proper old Tudor style almost castle in the highlands with a moat and surrounding manicured fields with deer and rabbits and the occasional tree leading all the way down to a loch. Me at one four seat table with white cloth and silver cutlery and some other guy in his forties who like me probably didn’t go to the gym or have ripped biceps. Just a normal guy sat at the next table facing me and also all alone. Boring musac played in the.
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