The end result was that Mattie was pregnant by April. Mattie was incredibly beautiful, as she progressed through the pregnancy. I remember one night, as we lay in bed, she was pressed against my back and I felt the baby kick for the first time. I actually jumped out of bed. She thought something was wrong with me, and when I explained, she couldn't stop laughing for fifteen minutes.Our son Jeff was born that December. There is nothing so invigorating or so terrifying, as being a father for the first time. The delivery was a time of sheer terror and guilt for me. There Mattie was in obvious pain, which I certainly played a significant role in causing, and my mind was flooded with a thousand thoughts, about every possible thing that could go wrong. At that point, I began to have doubts about the wisdom of having children; however, nothing went wrong. My dark thoughts dissipated as my son came into the world. The look of total joy, upon my wife's tired face, when she saw our boy, lit up. This it is, and nothing more."Presently my sense did weaken; hesitated, then went seekin', Through my dark subconconscous it went seekin' for the whore.But again while I was napping, came again the gentle rapping, Like a crowbar faintly tapping, tapping at my damper door, That I scarce was sure I heard... Here opened wide the damper door!Flames winked out; then nothing more.Deep into the darkness seeking, long I sat there, almost leakingYellow stains into my undies as I'd sometimes done before;Briefly silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token, 'Til the only words there spoken were the whispered sound, "Go lower."Stricken was I, and in echo murmured I the words, "'Go lower?'These are rodents, nothing more!"From the fireplace came a huffing, as of someone gruffly puffing, Soon thereaft I heard a grunting, somewhat louder than before, "Surely," said I, "surely, that is something bigger than a rat is.Armed I'm not save my Thesaurus, for this myst'ry to explore.Let my heart be.
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